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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28100286">Symbols</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blueleaf12/pseuds/Blueleaf12'>Blueleaf12</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fallout: New Vegas</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Followers of the Apocalypse (Fallout), For Auld Lang Syne spoilers, Gen, Independent New Vegas (Fallout), Lonesome Road DLC, One Shot, Platonic Relationships, i wrote this mostly for myself but ya’ll can read it anyway, if you can even call Ulysses and the Courier that, talking out feelings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 21:21:04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,120</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28100286</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blueleaf12/pseuds/Blueleaf12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The Courier returned to The Divide once more, the weight of ED-E’s passing heavy on her shoulders. She might not be able to fix or return The Divide back to what it was, but she could make a difference.</p>
<p>It all started with a symbol, after all.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Female Courier &amp; Arcade Gannon, Female Courier &amp; ED-E, Female Courier &amp; Ulysses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Symbols</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Please note this is my first time playing New Vegas and I have not played the previous Fallout games, so some things may be wrong. Please tell me!</p>
<p>Also my Courier’s name is Lilly. I gave her this name after an old oc—I didn’t know about nightkin Lilly until after I sunk in 30+ hours in the game. This Lilly and that Lilly aren’t the same.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I see you have returned to The Divide. Do you have any more questions?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Hi, Ulysses.” Lilly said. Ulysses didn’t look her in the eye. “Do you mind if I sit down?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Not at all. Everyone needs to rest their legs sometime.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Lilly plopped down on the ground before pulling her courier duster off. She adjusted the mask Ulysses gave her before smoothing out the coat on the ground. The old war symbol stared back at Lilly, twisting her insides.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ulysses pried his gaze away from The Divide and turned to face Lilly. His expression was impossible to read; he didn’t even blink. “An Old World Symbol, one that you carry on your back, one that lead you to The Divide. I was wondering what you were going to do about it.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“It’s the no object permanence. Kinda forgot about it for a bit until now.” Lilly quipped. “Either you’re gonna can it for a bit or you can help me. I figured you’d want to watch this.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ulysses raised a single eyebrow. “I’ll sit here and watch, then. Let you monologue for once.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1"><span class="s1">“Oh, I’m gonna monologue alright.” Lilly reached into her bag and pulled out a dark aerosol can. She shook it vigorously before covering the symbol on the back of her duster. “I’m going to be real with you. As soon as I left The Divide and got your final message, I broke down. Hard. Sobbed for hours. I don’t even know how I made it back to Freeside. I don’t remember any of it. All I remember is just waking up in the Old Mormon Fort and being unable to talk for </span> <span class="s2">days</span> <span class="s1"> until I snapped out of it.”</span></p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ulysses watched Lilly with neutral eyes, but said nothing.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I talked to my companion Arcade about it all. I had a feeling he would know about what I saw. I wasn’t wrong. He... knows Old World Technology. Nearly blanched when he saw my coat. However, I couldn’t part with it.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Lilly put the dark aerosol away before pulling out a bright red aerosol and an ancient ceramic plate. “You went on and on about symbols. About how they influence others, and become bigger than what they originally were. And I thought about that, hard, before I walked all the way back here. And this is my conclusion.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Merely covering up the past? Hiding it?” Ulysses prompted.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Not hiding it, per se. Making it something else. Doing better.” Lilly checked the back of the coat and decided it was dry enough. She placed the plate upside down on her coat, then shook the red aerosol. She used the plate to draw a perfect red circle on the back. “I thought about it, and I know what you said about New Vegas’s independence, but my heart chose the Followers. Even they are not free from a dubious past.” She smirked, even if Ulysses couldn’t see it.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Amicable.” Ulysses said. “Maybe it’s a new symbol for you to carry, one that you believe in, and one that won’t put a target on your back. But the Old World symbol is still there. The paint flicks off, its weathered with time, the leather cracks and fades with age. It’ll rear its head eventually, exposing you.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I have paint. I’ll cover it again.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“It goes deeper than that, Courier. It’s something you’ll carry until you perish, deep within you. Like the remnants of The Divide, always waiting. Ready to pounce, to throw you off a cliff and into hellfire below.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“This isn’t the first time I’ve almost died. I can do it again.” Lilly peeled the plate off and put it aside. “It’s my burden to bear. May it be only a fraction of what I carry because of The Divide. I’m just... only able to go on because I know I’m not alone.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“My friend, Arcade... decided it was then to tell me more of his past. I had my suspicions. He means dearly to me, but... I knew something was up. He used to be part of the Old World Government. The Enclave.” Lilly felt a shiver pass through her. “The Divide wasn’t Enclave, but it was close enough. And with ED-E...” She trailed off.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What I’m getting is that I know I’m not the only one that’s done fucked up shit, even if it wasn’t my fault.” Lilly checked the spray paint again, before taking the red spray can and painting a smaller circle in the bigger one, before drawing the rest of the Follower’s cross. “Arcade left the Enclave when he was so young, too young to have been responsible for anything they ever did, but he still carries that burden being alive. But he decided to do better with his life. And so have I.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“The Cross does not crucify, but props up others, supporting them.” Ulysses mused. “But even the Bull relied on The Cross, and look where that got him.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“God, don’t even get me started on when I heard about that.” Lilly sighed. “I almost couldn’t believe it... it hurt my heart.” She then shook her head. “But that’s not the Followers’s fault. Maybe they had no business meddling with Tribes, but Caesar being Caesar, the Great Khans abusing their education to mass produce chems... it’s all interconnected. The Khans wouldn’t have to resort to chems if the NCR didn’t send them away. The NCR dug their own grave.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“As the Bear has.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1"><span class="s1">Lilly put some finishing touches on the Followers Cross on her back before capping the aerosol. She tossed it back in her bag, letting her coat dry. “I don’t really know where I’m going with this except for I’m going to do better. Even if I can’t fix The Divide, it takes one day realizing you fucked up to do better. Even if people don’t believe you, forgive you, or even </span> <span class="s2">know</span> <span class="s1">.”</span></p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Not a lot of people see redemption like that, Courier. All a focus on forgiving, of offloading that emotional burden we carry. Even if just a handful of people know of your previous sins. It’s enough.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m not asking you to forgive me, Ulysses. But I hope this was symbolic enough for you to know I was serious. Even after diverting the missiles, costing ED-E his life.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ulysses was silent as he closed his eyes and thought. The wind howled for him down in The Divide, Marked Men shambling around like Old World zombies, the dead long since buried. Red lights in the distance flared and calmed like a heartbeat, the Courier’s Mile a dead wasteland.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I accept.” Ulysses said. “You have my word.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“...Thanks.” Lilly’s shoulders slumped. “It means more than you think.” </span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Believe me, Courier. I know.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I really liked Lonesome Road. I think it was the best DLC out of the four. I also really liked Dead Money, but Old World Blues and Honest Hearts weren’t that great. I played Old World Blues at the recommended level (15) and got my ass handed to me by the robot scorpions. Wouldn’t recommend.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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